1. I've began assuming that every person I dislike or am in opposition with is Italian-- an act I've coined as "italivestigating"-- to near-perfect levels of success.
2. Something natural and free is Horse, something mechanical and loud is Helicopter, and something large and calm yet foreboding is Elephant. These three form a triangle to which the middle is the common property of vehicularity.
3. Preamble: Further intricacies of the Horse-Helicopter-Elephant triangle will be discussed later. Everything that falls between them is assumed to be viewed in a positive light by the declaree.
4. Computers and computer software that don't work for the user should be sent to a place called 無間地獄 (Avici Hell) wherein they must suffer forever.
5. This is too much to ask for so the next best thing is to donate it to a Filipino pretending to be a white supremacist.
6. If someone you think is normal and college-educated tries to talk to you about college please do not listen to them they work for the government. Unless you can detect a visceral truth in their tone they are likely lying to you in an attempt to demoralize you into dropping out. This is one of the newest ways America's shadow governance is trying to usher in a manufacturing economy composed of serfs.
7. Degrees in the general "business" denomination are all fake. Assume every "college-educated" individual has a business degree unless explicitly stated otherwise while kowtowing at your feet.
8. They should dissolve every academic institution in the southern United States and keep the ameteur sports teams so we can get to see gun slinging crackers throw to their felon receivers without the threat of academic ineligibility via pre-algebra.
9. They need to stop being afraid to let white boys go for deep balls.
10. I'm under the impression that KAIST should've mercy-killed gambs instead of gangstalking him.
11. I'm under the impression that none of you actually know Japanese and you just pretend to for male sexual approval.
12. "None of you" skews male.
13. Horses can be male, but not every male is a horse.
14. Shadow of the Colossus (2005) where you're Nadecola's syphilis tasked with finding and transmitting itself to 16 Milady Rave DJs.
15. The worst things happen to horses.
16. Above sentiment applies to both racing and death.
17. To be held and compulsed to act against your will for other's potential financial benefit is considerably worse than death.
18. I am NOT saying that you should kill yourself before you get a job, or if you're employed you should kill yourself (see 13).
19. If you noticed that women were omitted from the above statements, please understand that I hate when girls die.
20. Horses don't stop, they keep going.
21. Posting on the internet is inherently voyeuristic. Not being sexually attracted to the idea of posting is being disingenuous.
22. This doesn't make the posts sexually charged by proxy.
23. You should seriously go outside and walk around a bit.
24. If you live in a hyper-paranoid suburb and you trip off any outdoor-facing home security systems, give them a reason to be afraid.
25. Not to incite violence but to maybe invite ideas of cool and awesome pranks centered around spreading love and joy in the community.
26. Joy has left the public conscious and that's why everything is the way it is.
27. Nobody really has any money in any tangible way anymore.
28. 26 and 27 play into eachother.
29. Speaking of close relatives playing in any given proximity with eachother, I've been getting really into lesbian incest porn lately.
30. Having no money and still being fulfilled with your life is an inherently European ideal that doesn't work in any country where drive-in coffee shops exist.